Petting a horse can be a calm and rewarding way to build trust and connection. Many horse owners and enthusiasts enjoy bonding through gentle touch, but it’s important to remember that each horse has its own preferences. While some areas, like the withers or upper neck, are commonly well-received, others—such as the legs or near the tail—can be more sensitive and may cause discomfort or anxiety in certain horses. Observing your horse’s body language and respecting their boundaries is key, as not all horses enjoy being petted, and even friendly ones may have “no-go” zones.
Here is everything you need to know about petting horses, including the best spots to try, the ones to avoid, and how to pet horses properly.
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Top 5 Spots Many Horses Enjoy Being Pet
These spots are generally safe areas to pet on a horse. Almost all horses accept and enjoy petting in these areas.
1. Side of the Neck
The side is one of the largest and safest areas to pet a horse. Horses prefer being approached from the side as opposed to the front or behind. Horses like having their sides petted, brushed, and patted. The side is the perfect place to pet a horse for children or people unfamiliar with or nervous around horses.
2. Withers
Right above the shoulders are the withers. The withers is the ridge that extends from the base of a horse’s neck down the back between the shoulders. They are a great place to pet a horse for a number of reasons. First, it is an area that horses typically cannot reach on their own, so there is a chance that the withers can be itchy.
Second, it’s where horses groom each other. Both in the wild and in domesticated herds, horses stand next to each other and groom each other’s withers while also swatting flies away with their tails. That makes the withers an ideal place to pet a horse.
Image By: Lorri Lang, Pixabay
3. Base of the Neck or Chest
Soft circular motions near the base of the neck or front of the chest can be calming.. Horses typically can’t rub their necks unless they scratch themselves on something, so they don’t mind getting petted in this area. Just watch the head. If a horse whips its head around, they can hit you in the face while you are petting them, which can be painful and surprising.
4. Shoulder
The shoulder is another area where horses often enjoy gentle pressure. The shoulders are above the front legs (while the hips are a part of the rear legs.) Nearly all horses will enjoy a bit of a shoulder rub.
5. Hip Area (With Caution)
While some horses enjoy petting over the hip or hindquarters, others may be reactive in this area. Always watch the horse’s body language and proceed slowly if you’re unfamiliar with the individual animal.
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The 2 Horse Dependent Spots
These are spots that some horses like being petted in, but others will not, it depends on the individual horse, their history, and your relationship with them. If your horse starts pulling away, exhaling loudly, or throwing their head, they do not want to be petted in these areas, and you should avoid doing so in the future.
1. Nose & Muzzle
Image By: Melek Arslan, Pexels
Horses’ noses are very soft, which makes them a popular place for people to touch. Many people automatically think that horses like being petted on the nose. But that is only sometimes the case. Some horses don’t mind nose pets, but others hate being touched on the nose. Horses’ noses are sensitive, and not all of them will appreciate petting in this area.
2. Ears
Similar to the nose, some horses like having their ears rubbed, and others do not. While a few well-socialized horses may tolerate ear rubs, most prefer you avoid this area unless a strong bond is established. Horses typically do not like being scratched, so scratching behind their ears is not a comfortable experience. Horses are not like dogs, but some don’t mind having their ears rubbed. A horse’s ears can get dirty and itchy, so petting can alleviate the discomfort.
Top 3 Spots to Avoid
Here are the spots you should generally avoid petting, especially with unfamiliar horses. These areas might need to be brushed or cleaned occasionally, but you should only touch them if you absolutely have to. These zones can trigger defensive or startled reactions and should be handled with care or by trained handlers only. You should always be careful and pay attention to your horse’s body language.
1. Rump
The horse’s blind spot is directly behind them, and a sudden touch here can startle them. While grooming and handling in this area is routine for horse owners, casual petting here, especially from someone the horse doesn’t know, is not recommended. It is a sensitive area that horses do not like being touched in.
Image By: 4.murat, Shutterstock
2. Tail
It might not seem like it at first glance, but most horses do not like having their tails touched. You should not pet their tails or pull on their tails. Although tail brushing is part of grooming, many horses are protective of their tails. Avoid petting here unless the horse knows you well and is accustomed to handling. Touching a horse’s tail could cause them to walk away or even kick, so be careful.
3. Legs & Hooves
The legs and hooves are another area that you should avoid petting since they are sensitive and bony. Horses don’t like picking up their hooves, they don’t like having their legs touched, and they don’t like having their hooves touched. You should avoid petting anything below the shoulders and hips. Touching a horse’s legs could cause them to take off or kick, so be careful around this area.
How to Pet a Horse
Horses like to be petted in a specific way. They enjoy long, slow, rhythmic strokes with some pressure. If you are petting a particular area, drag your hand across a long stretch of the horse. You can put some weight and force into it. Horses like the massaging feeling. Avoid ticklish touches and instead try gentle scratching.
Horses like it when you use a curry comb on them as well. A good curry and strong petting motions can make a horse feel great. You can also lightly scratch certain areas that might be itchy. Horses do not like being scratched as much as they like being petted. You can try scratching around a horse’s withers and ears in areas that tend to get itchy.
Image By: Ground Picture, Shutterstock
How to Approach a Horse for Petting
You should always approach a horse from the side – preferably their left or ‘near’ side – where they can see you. Horses do not like when you approach them from behind or directly from the front. Approach slowly and put your hand out. If the horse approaches you or doesn’t move, they are open to getting petted. Remember to let the horse sniff your hand before touching them. If you start approaching with your hand out and the horse turns, moves away, or starts acting agitated, they likely do not want any interaction. That is okay. Not all horses like being petted, and horses are not always in the mood to be touched. Horses are prey animals and may react unpredictably to sudden or unfamiliar touch. Always ask the owner or handler if it’s okay to interact with them, and if so, let the horse approach you.
Always start at the neck or shoulder, with firm, sweeping strokes, and keep one hand on the horse as you move about the body. This helps them keep track of where you are, and avoids startling them. Horses are most dangerous when they are startled!
You should never pet an unfamiliar horse without someone around who knows the horse. Some horses can be unpredictable, and most do not like being touched in certain areas. Petting an unfamiliar horse can lead to stress and aggression. If you get to know your horse, you will learn to read their body language over time. You will quickly figure out how and when to pet your horse.
Conclusion
While each horse is different, many enjoy being petted along the neck, shoulders, and withers—especially with calm, steady strokes. In general, it’s best to start at the side of the horse towards the front, and avoid more sensitive areas like the legs, belly, and tail, unless you know the horse well. Always approach with care, pay attention to the horse’s signals, and respect their preferences. Building trust through gentle, thoughtful interaction is key to a positive experience for both you and the horse.
Grant is a freelance writer with years of experience writing about a diverse range of topics. He currently lives in the sunny state of Florida with his wife and son. His days are spent writing and caring for eight animals (two horses, two donkeys, two goats, and two dogs).
